I almost didn't buy this, even though it was only priced 69¢. But then my better self prevailed. This is what my mental checklist looks like when I'm debating a purchase: Uniquely Ugly? From The 70s? Cheap? And its corollary: Good For A Cheap Laugh? This little angel checked out on all four key points. Plus, it was being sold at St. Vincent De Paul's thrift store, a fitting place for a "Halo" product. The more I looked at this item, the stranger it became. What is it about the 70s that so successfully combined the sunny schmaltz of Lawrence Welk with the smoldering menace of some lower pits in Hell? I guess that mystery is why I'll always be intrigued by the years 1969—1979. The still stinky "ornament" looks more like a stoned Squeaky Fromme than an Angel. Like it just wants to smoke another three bongs and drop some more tabs before shooting Gerald Ford. How dare his wife open a rehab center! But wait, Squeaky was the original Charlie's Angel, as greater minds than mine have pointed out. (Please see Vegetarians Are Evil for further insights.) So it all just works for me somehow. Which is why I finally forked over the 69¢.
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